From the desk of Louise P. Campbell Q.C.:
When you are in a position where you have to have direct contact with the other person, I suggest that you get the book “Rebuilding”, by Fisher. It tells you not to get drawn into the mud slinging. Stick to the topic. One author calls it “BIFF”. Give brief, informative, friendly and firm answers to questions. So, sometimes you just say, “No, I can’t talk to you about that right now, I have to talk to my lawyer”, and you blame it on the lawyers, so that you only engage as minimally as required.
On a larger scale, depending on your lawyer’s advice, it is preferable to go into some form of mediation or collaborative law to try to solve the things through communication rather than through fighting about it in court. This could also save you a lot of money. But, the real bottom line is that if the other side is determined to fight it through court, then you don’t have any choice but to go with it. Sometimes when the other side becomes convinced you are prepared to respond continually to the process, they are then persuaded to settle.